Listen to the Whispers

Sitting on my yoga mat I say whatever comes to mind. I wonder sometimes if it is the students that are listening to me that need to hear my message or if the messages come through me but are really for me.

Listen to your body, I say it over and over. Your body will tell you what it needs. It will give you small, subtle messages and it is for you to act on them. If you don't act on those subtle messages your body will scream at you to get your attention.

I say this in a class where someone has arthritis, someone has had open heart surgery, someone has had a stroke and someone is hemorrhaging blood.

It's too late for the subtle clues, we are past that.

Are we listening yet?

On the outside we all look fine. We go to work, we take care of our families, we smile and laugh. While on the inside it feels like our bodies have betrayed us.

What went wrong? Why me?

Are we listening yet?

I am the yoga teacher. I am supposed to know better, to do better. Yet it is I that is slowly losing my life force. I get dizzy sometimes and running up the stairs leaves me winded and light headed.

I'm bleeding out. It is a hormonal imbalance. I should be too young for menopause. The doctor checked for cancer and it's not that. So what is it? 

It is my body screaming at me to listen.  Listen now, before it's too late. Make changes, rest more, connect with people, find your truth and live it.

My body is screaming at me while blood pores our of my vagina. I leave blood stains on my sheets and on my jeans and even on my yoga mat. So much blood can not be contained.

Yet my life goes on as normal. No one questions, no one notices. 

I have a choice. It is a choice that faces all of us at some point. I can do something different or I can ignore what my body is telling me. I can have surgery where a part of my body is cut out of me and then proceed with my life like nothing ever happened or I can make some changes. 

I wonder, if I have surgery and let my uterus be removed from me, what message will my body give me next? If I don't slow down and listen to the screams how will the message manifest the next time? What does listening to my body even look like? 

Listening to my body means taking a nap, and going to bed early.  It means saying no to new commitments.  It means taking a walk or resting with my legs up the wall.  It means eating fresh fruit and yogurt.  It means exploring my childhood wounds.  It means having tea with my best cousin. It also means calling my doctor and then listening to her, taking iron supplements.

This is what my body is telling me.  I focus on nurturing myself and healing my wounds.  

What is your body telling you?  What do you need to do more of?  What do you need to stop doing? Who do you need to spend more time with?  Who do you need to spend less time with?  What emotional wounds are manifesting in your body?  What are you denying and ignoring and rejecting about yourself?  

You are the only one that can do this work.  Listen to your body as it whispers to you, make changes before it starts to scream. You are worth it.