Living With Wet Panties

Did you marry a frog and expect him to behave like a prince?


Did you drop out of high school and expect to land the job of your dreams?

Did you spend $1000 on a beater car and expect it to get you from here to there without breaking down?

I heard some good advice lately... if you invest your time and energy into a douche bag, you can't get upset when he acts like a douche.

This was followed by a fascinating simile.

It is like using light day pads and expecting them to keep your panties dry when you pee yourself. Either you invest in some Depends or your get used to having wet panties.

This made me think, what am I investing in?  Most of the time, I invest in me.  I'm sure that's a good investment.  Yoga, meditation, college, long walks, early bedtimes, good books, adventures with friends, snuggle time with my littles.  I do this because I know that I'm valuable and worth taking good care of.  It is worth it to me to invest my time, energy and emotions into me.

I invest in my children.  I cook for them.  I drive them to sports and music.  I volunteer in their classrooms.  I help with homework. I sing them songs and laugh and dance and play with them.  I know they are valuable and it is important to me to invest in them now, before they grow up and move away.

But, I've made my fair share of bad investments over the years and I'm sure I'll make more in the future.

Have you ever peed yourself?  I've been pregnant 7 times.  That means for about 63 months of my life I've had someone sitting on my bladder.  A sneeze, a cough, a laugh, can lead to leakage.  It didn't happen often but every time it did, there was the same emotion.  Ugh.  I can't believe it.  A little bit of shame, a sense of disbelief and then the awful uncomfortable feeling of wet panties.  I should know better, have more control.

Over and over again, we invest in light days and then feel the shock and shame when our panties get wet.  What does this look like?  The boy that cheated on his girl with you, then you found him with someone else.  That car that was a great deal and looked good but was rusted out and wouldn't pass inspection.  The fantastic job that paid good but had horrible hours and a nasty boss.

Unfortunately these are the things we regularly invest in.  We put our time, our money, our energy and our emotions into these things because they look good, they smell good, they sound good.  We become attached.  That's my guy, my car, my job and when we discover they aren't as good as we thought, we're stuck.  They're already ours, we're already invested.  The shame of the wet panties is compounded by the shame that we made a bad choice.  We convince ourselves that we can stick it out, it will get better.  We put more and more money into the car, we work even harder at the job, we spend even more time with the lying, cheating guy.

The more we invest, the more stuck we get, the more shame we feel.  We should have known better.  Yet here we are, with a job we hate, a bad relationship and a car that won't get us down the street.  It is our pride that keeps us stuck.  We don't want to admit that we made a bad investment.  The smart choice, as soon as you realize that you've made a bad investment, get out.

Get out now!

Don't wait.  Don't keep investing your resources thinking that it will get better.  Do your really want to live your life with the shame and discomfort of wet panties?

I promise there is not a single person in this world who hasn't wet their panties at least once.  We've all done it, a job, a guy (or girl) an investment.  We've all pinned our hopes and dreams on something or someone and gotten disappointed.  Instead of wasting your energy, your emotions, your time, move on, forgive yourself.

Invest in quality.