Introducing Victoria

I am a yoga teacher.  I am a hypnotherapist and a life coach. I've studied nutrition, as well as religion and spirituality.  I'm fascinated by Ayurvedic medicine.  I can have an educated conversation about homeopathy, flower remedies and accupressure. 

I'm also a single mom of seven. 

I've been married and divorced twice. I have experienced childhood molestation and domestic violence. I've lived with addictions and mental illness. 

I've lost my home to foreclosure and lived in poverty.  

I've gained weight and lost weight and gained it back again. I've been sick and tired. 

I'm addicted to sugar. I eat meat and I'm partial to vodka and loud music.

I've had sex with a stranger on a beach and had an affair with a married man. 

I fight with my boyfriend, get impatient with my mother and even sometimes yell at my kids. 

But I am a survivor and a warrior.

Through it all I have learned that not one of us is any better than any one else. We all have our broken parts. We all carry wounds. We all do things we shouldn't.  We have addictions.  We make bad choices. We struggle with fears and insecurities. We lose ourselves.

As a society we expect certain things of certain people.  If our doctor is an obese, chain smoker on meds for high blood pressure we don't put a lot of faith in him. If our hair dresser looks a fright with bags under her eyes and a really bad dye job, we'll probably go somewhere else.

So we expect our yoga teacher and life coach to have a lithe flexible body and to have all her ducks in a row. We expect good choices, a healthy lifestyle, inspiring monologues while we've got our ass in the air for a down dog

I don't have it all together. I make bad choices. I have wounds.

So why would you trust me to be your teacher and your coach?

Because I've been there. I've done that. I've survived and come out on the other side. I will never judge you and will always encourage you. I know what it's like to be broken and scared. I know the fear and hopelessness. 

I've cried the same tears, felt the same  frustration and loneliness.  I know that I don't have all the answers. 

And I know that you do have the answers within you. I know that you have the strength and the power and the courage to handle everything that life throws at you.

Because I know that some days you just need to pull the blankets over your head and cry. Some days you need to give up, to walk away. Some days you will fall and you will fail. I know that there will be bad days and hard choices. I know there will be days when you would rather do anything then sit with your fear.

I know because I've been there. I've seen my life burn down around me leaving me with nothing.  I've  cried tears of rage and grief. I've learned how to forgive. I've learned to face and feel my fear. I've learned to keep my heart open even when it's hard and it hurts.

I am not here to show you the way, to teach you or preach to you. I'm not here to inspire you. I'm here to walk beside you for a while. To encourage you when you fall. To celebrate your successes.  To share your pain and your sorrows.

I'm here because I want you to know that you are not alone. 

A Night in Neverland

Like a fairy tale, he appeared from nowhere. He wooed me with sweet songs and sexy kisses. Dancing together by the light of the moon, we played in Neverland, where time has no meaning and age is just a number.

Peter Pan stole my heart that night, asking me to believe in myths, like true love and happily ever after. He asked me questions that I have no answers for, leaving me uncertain and troubled.

I didn't know I was lost until he found me. I didn't know I was searching until he showed me. I didn't know I was lonely until he held me.

Peter Pan revealed to me how I have been living my life running from dragons that steal my joy and keep me confined. For just a moment I felt the freedom and joy of pixie dust.  I soared among the stars. I loved and laughed and played in Neverland where time has no meaning and age is just a number.

With dawn the pixie dust wore off and I crashed back into reality.  I came face to face with the dragons of the real world. I stared into the mirror at my own eyes, heavy with burdens and sorrows. I danced with my own loneliness.

I didn't know what I was missing until he found me. Now I ache to go back to Neverland, where time has no meaning and age is just a number. I long to fly with Peter Pan once again. But he has forgotten me and I remain trapped in the real world, without pixie dust, without joy, without love. 

I didn't know I was lost until he found me. I didn't know I was searching until he showed me. I didn't know I was lonely until he held me. Then he left me, flying back to his fairy tales and leaving me lost, searching and lonely, yearning for Neverland and the love of Peter Pan.